Last week I had a bit to say about disappointment, and how it holds you back from getting out of life what you really want, including getting slimmer.
By not setting your sights on what you really want to avoid disappointment, is actually disappointing all in itself. It’s definitely a lose/lose situation! So perhaps it’s time to try approaching it a bit differently.
Instead of blocking yourself from the start by closing your thoughts down by thinking stuff like “I can’t do it, I can’t have that”, allow yourself to actually think about what you really want. Let your mind wonder and explore what it would be like to have that.
Just flirt with the idea, there’s no harm in that. Having thoughts about something doesn’t commit you to anything, you’re just thinking about it.
When you allow yourself to just think about something without expectation or disappointment getting in the way, you can enjoy the thoughts, and excitement can grow about the possibility of it happening. Remember you’re not committing to anything right now, so if you don’t achieve it there’s no disappointment.
At this early point in thinking about what you really want, it’s just not necessary to do anything else at all. But at some point something will begin to happen of its own natural accord, without you having to force yourself into something (like a diet or gym membership for example).
When you keep thinking about something (perhaps being a lot slimmer) and wondering what it would be like, imagining how it might be, and feel happy or even excited about that thought – it can start to take on a life of its own.
At some point you will feel like you can’t help but to take steps towards what you’ve been thinking about, because you’ll be drawn to it. When you’ve been thinking about something long enough, you get to the point where it feels completely wrong not to do anything about it.
You’ll feel enticed and pulled towards what it is you want, which it is that you’ve been thinking about.
This is a far cry from looking at yourself as you are now, getting miserable about it, and rushing into a diet to ‘fix the problem’. In this case you’re forcing yourself to do something horrible, and pushing yourself to stick to it.
At some point you’ll push back and say ‘no’, because no one like being told what to do, even when we’re doing it to ourselves.
Instead allow yourself to be drawn in by what you want, by allowing yourself to set your sights on what you want, without letting disappointment kill your wishes before they’ve even taken proper shape.
Have a fantastic week!
Dr Julie